Somewhere between 1991 and 2014 (or “whilst I was away”) a terrible revolution happened where brilliant animated kids TV shows with awesome characters and frankly, nail-biting story lines got replaced by either computer generated blobs or people dressed up in silly costumes running round fields being weird.
I read that Serena might be OK to start watching a bit of TV as additional entertainment so I tried her on In The Night Garden (someone is on crack) and Baby TV (someone can’t be ars*d anymore) and when I couldn’t take those any longer, I had a browse but couldn’t find anything decent. I was secretly looking forward to getting back into a bit of Thundercats, catching up with the cast of She’Ra, getting up on a Saturday morning to a few episodes of Count Duckula and Dogtanian. I was disappointed, nay, dismayed to see they are no longer on!
4 coloured blobs with various antenae prance about life eating toast and custard aided by a possessed hoover.
Various children and a dog are dumped on an early middle aged transvestite whilst their parents screw up in their jobs. There is singing.
Children whose voices don’t match their mouths do yoga on astroturf whilst interacting with floaty fuckers.
Charlie and Lola:
Older brother looks after younger sister who has clearly bludgeoned their parents to death. He must think happy thoughts or she will be angered.
What happened to character development? There’s a whole generation of kids who won’t be able to sing “Down at Fraggle rock, grab a Fraggle by it’s c…” OK maybe that’s not such a bad thing but still, they’ll never get to experience Animals of Farthing Wood or Super Ted!
After a hard week at school successfully navigating cyber bullies, internet trolls, sexting, twerking, soft porn Miley Cyrus videos and if the papers are to be believed, paedos on every street corner, surely the least they deserve is a Saturday morning off, watching some rip-roaringly awesome cartoons!
Well, I know what I’m buying Serena for Christmas.